Sunday, 20 November 2011

around me

She was transferred to my office on marriage grounds from the other unit. Tall, beautiful and a smile to die for. They were a small family: she , her husband and her in-laws living in a duplex home at a decent society. Her husband along with a steady job co-owned a small telecom business and her father-in-law was a retired government officer. Like every new bride at a new home, she had to make some adjustments in her new home. She quitted her habit of drinking morning tea as none in her family drink tea early morning. To start for her office at 8:00 am, she has to get-up and rush to the kitchen to make breakfast for everyone and lunch for herself, in the evening reach hhome at 7:00 and cook dinner for all. She accustomed herself with the big city travel system and changed 2 buses to reach office on time. Work at office was also not very smooth and work under a hot-tempered boss has its own ill-effects. Once she told how her mother-in-law gifted her a gold bracelet of exactly same design as the one she had lost earlier. We were impressed after all whose mother-in-law gifts gold even after marriage.
A year into marriage, she hadnt been to her parents home. She yearned to go home. Any requests to her husband to take her home were transferred to her mother-in-law who dilly-dallied it to next time. The work she used to do at home and then managing to work as efficiently at office was really tough. From 6:00 in the morning till night she was in a constant grind and even on that her mother-in-law insisted to wake up a bit more early so that she can manage everything better. She tried her best to ensure her mother-in-law that she had no interests to come in between her and her son and that the husband would always been her so first.Its not like that she didnt discuss the problem or spoke her mind but whenever she did, the mother-in-law started crying and cursing herself and the girl started feeling guilty for making her mother-in-law sad and crying.
Soon she got pregnant, by chance. They were not prepared for it but went with the flow. With months into pregnancy, she faced difficulty doing the house-hold chores like kneading dough and standing constantly at the kitchen. On coaxing her family to get a maid for some help, her mother-in-law wondered aloud that if the girl is having any problem to do house-hold work , she(the mom-in-law) is fit enough to do the work and there is no need for the maid as they are unhygenic and dont do things properly.
Once after reaching home after office with a headache, she asked her husband to get her a glass of water. That was , may be, the first time the boy was doing anything for her. As he was taking the water bottle for her to their room, the mother-in-law taunted her son, "So now the queen cant even drink water on her own?" That was the day and since then she had sworn to not get her husband to do anything for her before the mother-in-law.
In the mean-time, her father-in-law got a heart-attack. The focus was now the health of the father-in-law. Not that she was ever the focus of the house as it was always her mother-in-law. As she wondered sometime that noone in the family has shown any care or love for her health. The husband would run post to pillar if her mother will get a headache and when she demanded extra-care owing to her pregnancy would ask "why? you dont have any problem."
In the second trimester when she desired to have delivery at her parent's home, the mother-in-law and her husband made it clear that they are nobody to say in this matter. But whatever happens. she will be solely responsible for it. The girl went to her parents place for a day and returned back the same evening from the train.
Till her last days before taking maternity leave, she came to the office from the same bus, while earlier she was contemplating to get a driver and came to office in the family car.
The girl had a love-marriage. She knew her husband before the marriage. This is an outsider's perspective from what we hear from her, may be the things were not as dark in the inside. The insecurity of a woman that her son will not hers after marriage, the husband who does his best to be the good son of his mother and made it clear to his wife that her mother is the first priority in his life, a girl away from her family and friends entangled in the roles of the dutiful daughter-in-law and wife, loveless relations and as she earlier confesses, in no feeling of maternal affection with her womb. A sad state to be in and all one can wish is a happy beginning to her family with the new baby.


  1. It's indeed sad , especiallt the part where husband still runs after the mother, inconsiderate about the wife and the child. It's surprising that the marriage is love, which went off the air after marriage.
    i won't give her sympathy but appreciate her courage to handle things solely. She is indeed very strong. God bless her and the baby and give some brain to her husband and ain laws.

  2. I missed u here , Happy to see u back :)

  3. @neha yes she is innocence personified and so strong..when i see her,i wonder how much stamina she has to be so much and so more..her tale disturbed makes me sad and angry..j